Before the War Begins
The after effects of the war are a bit uglier than the demolished homes in southern Lebanon, or the demolished bridges and buildings all over the country. They are a bit sadder than the thousands who got killed or the hundreds of thousands who were displaced. The after effects are a bit dirtier than the garbage and cockroaches and rats that now occupy the streets of Beirut and other Lebanese cities.
Walking down a major street in the capital, I began noticing a recurrence of a strange phenomenon. Children (in Lebanon, this means anywhere between 6 and 60) and young men are standing in groups on the corners of the street dangerously waving pocket knives. These knives are a bit more intimidating than your mignon Swiss Army Knife. They are a bit more evil.
For just over $3, you can get one of these 4-inch knives. For a bit more cash, you can get some with teeth, ones with a compass, and ones with a battery-powered flashlight, a knife with a built-in microwave, one with mine detectors, one with a phone, or just a gold-plated one. No matter what your taste in knives is, you can find one somewhere in Beirut.
The kids. Back to the kids. As I walk the streets, I make eye contact with boys who hold their knives in their hands or swing them around dangerously in a show of masculine power. I think Freud would say it has something to do with penis size.
size doesn't matter
I say it has to do with the fact that these men are pumped full of hate by their political and religious leaders. These young boys and men are full of frustration and violence that needs venting. They carry these knives in order to feel powerful. It’s the same as carrying a gun—the same feeling of having a big penis. The same feeling of power. The only difference is that it’s easier to buy a knife. And cheaper.
These poor boys.
They need to feel that they can take on any enemy, any time. The "rules of engagement", so to speak. These young boys feel so insecure and so threatened, they need to carry this knife in order to feel powerful. Yes, some carry it simply because they are morons. But others flaunt the knife in public to show that they are "armed".
All this, of course, within walking distance from the nearest police station. I always stress this point: Most of the shit that goes down in Beirut city takes place in the vicinity of police stations. The stupid cops just care about driving around in their white Pathfinders and hitting on girls (aged 6-60).
the great escape
Two nights ago, I was walking past one of these pieces of human waste standing on the corner near where I live. One of the boys pulled out a knife, flicked open with dexterity that would have made David Copperfield burn with envy. The young prick held the knife as if he was about to go Halal-Beef on me. He ran the blade slowly across his own neck in one of those cartoon gestures which mean “I’m gonna kill ya!”
Meanwhile, I had only enough time to see the melodramatic gesture and move on. I pretended I didn’t see him. I moved past him like a breeze, invisible and soundless. I wasn’t in for a confrontation with a 14-year-old with a knife.
I am reminded of a line from a poem I once wrote while doing my army service back in 2003:
“I have no weapons
So I escape
Before the war
Begins”
Walking down a major street in the capital, I began noticing a recurrence of a strange phenomenon. Children (in Lebanon, this means anywhere between 6 and 60) and young men are standing in groups on the corners of the street dangerously waving pocket knives. These knives are a bit more intimidating than your mignon Swiss Army Knife. They are a bit more evil.
For just over $3, you can get one of these 4-inch knives. For a bit more cash, you can get some with teeth, ones with a compass, and ones with a battery-powered flashlight, a knife with a built-in microwave, one with mine detectors, one with a phone, or just a gold-plated one. No matter what your taste in knives is, you can find one somewhere in Beirut.
The kids. Back to the kids. As I walk the streets, I make eye contact with boys who hold their knives in their hands or swing them around dangerously in a show of masculine power. I think Freud would say it has something to do with penis size.
size doesn't matter
I say it has to do with the fact that these men are pumped full of hate by their political and religious leaders. These young boys and men are full of frustration and violence that needs venting. They carry these knives in order to feel powerful. It’s the same as carrying a gun—the same feeling of having a big penis. The same feeling of power. The only difference is that it’s easier to buy a knife. And cheaper.
These poor boys.
They need to feel that they can take on any enemy, any time. The "rules of engagement", so to speak. These young boys feel so insecure and so threatened, they need to carry this knife in order to feel powerful. Yes, some carry it simply because they are morons. But others flaunt the knife in public to show that they are "armed".
All this, of course, within walking distance from the nearest police station. I always stress this point: Most of the shit that goes down in Beirut city takes place in the vicinity of police stations. The stupid cops just care about driving around in their white Pathfinders and hitting on girls (aged 6-60).
the great escape
Two nights ago, I was walking past one of these pieces of human waste standing on the corner near where I live. One of the boys pulled out a knife, flicked open with dexterity that would have made David Copperfield burn with envy. The young prick held the knife as if he was about to go Halal-Beef on me. He ran the blade slowly across his own neck in one of those cartoon gestures which mean “I’m gonna kill ya!”
Meanwhile, I had only enough time to see the melodramatic gesture and move on. I pretended I didn’t see him. I moved past him like a breeze, invisible and soundless. I wasn’t in for a confrontation with a 14-year-old with a knife.
I am reminded of a line from a poem I once wrote while doing my army service back in 2003:
“I have no weapons
So I escape
Before the war
Begins”
